There Are People Who Agree with Me, and People Who Are Wrong
By: Ethan Schutz
I don’t like to admit it, but sometimes this is what I really mean when I ask other people for their views. In those moments, it doesn’t matter what they say, I’ll hear anything they say through this filter. And, if what they say doesn’t fit with my view I’ll tell them, subtly or not so subtly, how they’re wrong.
I’ve noticed that no one actually responds well to me when I do that. Funny thing! People don’t like being told they’re wrong. It’s the same as being criticized.
So how do we express differences of opinion? Our communication training shows that the key is to check one’s self, to listen closely to our inner voice, our true intention.
I ask myself, am I trying to be right? Or am I simply stating my viewpoint and truly wanting to hear other people’s views?
When my true intention is to exchange points of view, a funny thing happens. I hear more. I understand more. I get more input from other people. But that’s not because they’re saying anything more, necessarily.
It’s because my intention is to hear them.
Intention and attitude are at the heart of the way we communicate with others.